Watching the front roll through.

We were readmitted yesterday.

Bede's first ambulance ride.

Bede’s first ambulance ride.

Bede’s little soul is agitated. Wearied but not yet worn. He has been working hard, He has spent the night and most of the day sleeping on my chest. I can feel his little chest rising and falling against my own. Breathing is hard work. Huff puff huff puff huff puff.

His plump, warm, soft hands resting on my throat feel like the greatest gift, His warmth blankets me. His determinedness fortifies me. His gentlenesss soothes me. His peace envelops me.

But that is all about me, this blog is not meant to be a testament to a mother’s love for her son. This blog bears witness to the most remarkable little human I have ever come across.

Bede is grounded. His light glows. Bede is tender and he is true. His strength is gentle but uncompromising.

I’m sure I have said it before but he reminds me of a ship. Forging forward, undeterred.

Waiting and watching the weather.

Waiting and watching.

In my last blog I likened chemo to sitting at the coast watching a front roll in. I grew up directly across the road from the open ocean. I would watch the clouds gather and know the storm and the gales are about to hit. The windows will rattle and the house will shake, you’ll lose power, the storm will batter you.

Now here we are in the thick of it. The storm has hit. Bede’s little body is being battered by a bacterial blood infection, he is septic. The doctor said today the kind of bacteria and infection he has is really as bad as it gets.  He is shaken but he is undeterred and so as his mum I’m really not scared. Bede has bunkered down and is enduring the front, like our old house he has a solid foundation, Team Bede. The collaboration of so much love, expertise, friendship, prayer, science, hope, faith, grit, with the most amazing leader and Bede really does lead the way.

We have caught the infection early. He is responding to the antibiotics.

I am in awe. I think one of the most remarkable attributes a person can have is the ability to just keep on keeping on. In the face of all adversity to put one foot in front of the other and battle on. My precious son completely embodies that ability and I am truly in awe of it.

Note: This entry was written last night. Bede is still a sick little baby but he is responding incredibly well to the antibiotics. Most of his blood counts are recovering very well and that includes his neutrophils which represent his immune system. Bede is not out of the woods yet but he’s finding his way.


23 thoughts on “Watching the front roll through.

  1. And I thought I was having a bad weekend!!! Reading your post has put my problems back in perspective ….. My prayers and thoughts are with Bede and the whole beautiful family. Xx

  2. Bede! “He maybe small but he is mighty” and Remarkable! We love him to bitz! Sending all our love, prayers and positive thoughts to you all. “TeamBede” all the way! Nan & Pop D xoxo

  3. Sending love, love & more love for u Bede & I pray you get better very soon❤ ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤

  4. So many skills this boy Bede has. Who knew all those years ago, watching the storms roll in and over that wonderful Issy would be blessed with three such wonderful guys in her life, Roy, Bede and G.

  5. Hi Bede,
    Vin and Marie alerted us to how strong you and your parents are. Yo have already had an impact upon the world. Are thoughts are with you.
    Michael & Rita Curtain

  6. What an amazing little soldier and his family, friends and doctors are his garrison and at this point the drugs and hospital are his fortress. So many battles fought and won.

  7. Stay strong Bede, keep on fighting little man, we are all praying for you and sending lots of positive thoughts and love and hope to you and your family.Glynn ,Gary and Jaime Thomas xxx

  8. Dear Isabel, Roy and dear Gus. My Daughter Jess told us about Bede, who is the same age as our own Grandson Flynn. I have shared your blog with most of our email buddies and my colleages at work, who all pray and think of you all. We talk about Baby Bede at lunch, over the photocopier, having a Coffee. We think of him, read about him and marvel at his determination. His life is a gift to us all and we are with you. All the very best wishes. God bless every minute. Much love Kate & Rob

  9. Keep fighting gorgeous Bede, I think and pray for you every day. This is just a little bump along the way I know you will pull through. Izzy and Roy both of you are amazing parents. Keep strong xx

  10. How is gorgeous and courageous Bede doing? We have been so worried for you all. Sending you so much love, prayers and positive thoughts for strength, peace and a lifetime of love.

  11. Sending love and strength to you mr bede. Always thinking of how wonderful you are and how blessed you are to have such incredible parents. Keep fighting!! Lots of love xxxx amy

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